He had no idea at first. The impact he had on me. I adored everything about him. From the very first night I met him I was captivated. No one else mattered. The rest of the room melted away and my focus was directed at him. His eyes, they changed with colour depending on the day, I was hypnotized and distracted, his voice, the late night conversations we had. We connected on such a deeper level and I couldn’t let it go.
I went away the summer after we’d met. I lived in the U.S, in Chicago and had an amazing summer. I grew so much as a person and learned more about myself than ever before. I was on my own, in the great big world, and became incredibly independent. I missed him, but was too afraid to tell him how I really felt. I made a pact with myself that once I returned to Ontario I’d spill. I chickened out. Yet a few months later, I found myself exactly where I wanted to be. Officially with him. Turns out, he missed me too. Things fell into place, the way that I’d dreamt of, as if fate came into play. Sometimes I have to remind myself that this is “real life.”
It’s something I dreamt of yet never thought would become a reality. I wished on every 11:11, shooting star, and even birthday candles. It wasn’t easy, and I wasn’t sure how to handle the situation. I knew he was the one, and I didn’t want to lose him. I felt it when he looked at me, when he talked to me, and when he danced with me in the kitchen.
I don’t know what I did to deserve him. I cannot imagine my life today without him. He’s my best friend, and the love of my life. He’s there through thick and thin, and adores me no matter what. I mean no matter what. I am not a peach everyday or in every way. I can be difficult, stubborn, and I have my flaws. If you could understand the severity of my morning breath you would commend him for putting up with me in the am. Seriously, he should receive some type of award for dealing with that horrendous trait of mine.
It is a surreal experience and feeling. All I know is, I’ve never loved the way I love him. I’ve never been loved the way he loves me. We have a great love, the kind that lasts forever, survives through thick and thin, and the kind of love I thought only existed in fairy tales and in my imagination.
So if he happens to read this, I adore you. I want to spend my forever with you. Your capacity to love amazes me, and you make me a better person. I’ve loved you since the first night, and I’m eternally grateful that we stumbled into each other’s lives.
I love you infinitely, with all my heart.